Thursday, March 30, 2006

Three-Dimensional Blasphemy

I'm considering publishing a glossy coffee table book filled with sumptuous pictures of all the weird crap that our patrons leave in their returned library books. In my short time here in the business, I've found an $800 IRS tax return check, a $20 bill, and a Green Card. Right now I'm building a personal collection of inspirational bookmarks with religious themes like the Beatitudes or pictures of various saints.

The real jewel of my collection, though, is a 3-D image of Pope John Paul II from the Vatican's "Psychedelic Pontiffs!" merchandising line. Another personal favorite is a bookmark apparently created and marketed by the ultra-hip Elks Club to appeal to today's impressionable youth. The message on the bookmark, which is a sentiment I'm hearing from all the cool kids nowadays, is "I'd rather eat bugs than do drugs!!!"

I don't know, maybe the cool kids aren't hanging out in libraries anymore like we did when I was a kid.

2 Comments:

Blogger Adjective Queen said...

I think Happy Bunny has been saving pictures she finds in books she checks out. Those might merit a chapter in your coffee table book!

10:20 AM  
Blogger The Collater said...

The Collater (i.e. you wife--watch out ladies!) wants to hear about a certain boy with hair horns.

7:21 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home